help me out

nightdemn · #1 (**permalink**) 12-08-2002, 11:28 AM

Hey bros, I think I'm going through a crisis right now in my life and I need some help. I am 20 years old and I just finished a 10 week cycle 6 weeks ago and I haven't been feeling like my self lately, partly due to supressed test levels. I had been with my girl for 3 years and 4 months and I love every single thing about her. It was so hard for me to lie to her face time after time again about my steroid use. Anyway, right after finishing my cycle, my sex drive went to shit, my positive mentally went negative and I was depressed 90% of the time and for some reason, she subconciously fed from my misery. Anyway, to say the least, she started losing feelings for me and we broke up 4 days ago and have not talked since, except for 2 emails and a quick phone call about 20 min. ago. I basically emailed her and told her how I felt and she emailed me back with the way she feels. So, I called her tonight and she talked to me just like I was a friend. I have a feeling it's over for good...I know that I can't blame steroids for what has happened because I chose to take them and therefor need to deal with the consequences in a mature manner. But it is so hard for me right now with finals next week. I am also worried about my performance in baseball with all of this stuff happening. For god sakes, it's 3:28 in the morning and I can't sleep and I have to be at work early in 6 hours. After this experience, if I ever decide to go on the juice again, I will only take dbol at 4 weeks max, winstrol and primobolan depot. Sorry if this post is a little off topic, but I really need to vent.
Thanks

preist943 · #2 (**permalink**) 12-08-2002, 02:12 PM

did you use hcg/clomid/nov when comeing off, and did you tapper off or just stop

superman1975 · #3 (**permalink**) 12-08-2002, 03:12 PM

this post sucks!!!!!!!! this is the reason gear gets a bad name-------you should have been honest--if she loves you she would understand---talk to her and dont do anything stupid to yourself--no woman is worth that

nightdemn · #4 (**permalink**) 12-08-2002, 06:21 PM

I used clomid coming off. She also said, time after time again that if I took them, she would never talk to me again. And she was serious! I mean, she called my bank account and found out that I took $300 out of it. I just told her it was to pay for the rest of my tuition that I still owed. The fact that she knew my bank account number and password was beyond me. She must have looked at one of my checks and tried some of the passwords that I use. Weird... Anyway, I know this post sucks. Trust me, I wish I didn't have to post it. But I feel better getting it out of my system. I think that I need me meet the hottest girl that I can find and go out on a date with her and by just talking, I will start to get over the X. But that might only creat new head aches. I don't know... Time to hit the gym extra hard!!!
Thanks for listening!!

builtbig · #5 (**permalink**) 12-08-2002, 06:40 PM

well I understand that people don't care to much for others doing drugs and will make life decsions about them and you! I think that no boy or girlfriend should leave a person because of sexual problems. this just go's to show that she doesn't care about you as a person. if that is the fact then you don't need her and it was a good decsion that you found this out about her know and not later when you like married or something! I would talk to her and tell her the truth and tell her how you feel. Present the fact that steroids are not that bad. I mean they use them in the med field all the time and I have had doctors tell me the same thing. try to reason with her and if she still blows you off then good that shows her and her character and you can start looking for someone that will really love you!

just what I think...

builtbig

cheer up man you will make it out of this slump/t\

fullblown495 · #6 (**permalink**) 12-08-2002, 07:58 PM

hang in there nightdemn, ive had my share of depression and i wouldn't wish it on my worst emeny.......pay no attention to superman, typical dumb meathead reply, thats what really gives bbers a bad name.......... your not whining about how steriods killed yur relationship, yur just gettin shiat off yur chest.......best way to handle yur feelings in my opinion.......

gl man

Bigbadasian · #7 (**permalink**) 12-09-2002, 03:10 AM

|--[\\\]>------ You definately didn't come off right. Your test levels are so low its' causing everything to go out of whack. This is one reason why i am never coming off! LOL! BTW...my ex-gf who supoosedly was ok with my AAS use and helping me with my rear tricep shots just told me last week she wasn't supportive of it...WTF...support for the past year and now all of a sudden she's not...that is why i am not going to tell my new gf about the AAS use...it's not worth it to me...again, this is just how I feel...not telling you guys to hide it from your girls, just me!

nightdemn · #8 (**permalink**) 12-09-2002, 05:26 AM

Bros, I really appreciate your feedback. Thank you! Stupid me, I alienated myself from just about all of my friends because I was so tied into that relationship and when it was over, I didn't really have anyone to talk to. I called a few old friends and we hung out last night and I feel a little better now. But what an experience! Once again, thanks for the posts. I actually feel a lot better after reading them.